


The Fourth Lady Crawley

by PananaPotterhead



Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: F/M, Gen, Not Canon Compliant, Original Character(s), Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-31
Updated: 2020-08-20
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:00:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25635460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PananaPotterhead/pseuds/PananaPotterhead
Summary: Ruth Crawley is the youngest of the Crawleys, and the most different. Struggling to find her place in the world, this story follows her through her journey of discovery, where not all is what it seems.Will include Robert/Cora and Mr Carson/Mrs Hughes mainly other than my OC Ruth. Mostly canon at the start but with my own twists :)
Relationships: Anna Bates/John Bates, Charles Carson/Elsie Hughes, Cora Crawley/Robert Crawley, Mary Crawley/Matthew Crawley, Tom Branson/Sybil Crawley
Comments: 5
Kudos: 8





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my take on the wonderful Downton Abbey if there were a fourth daughter between Robert and Cora. However, not all is how it seems.
> 
> This story will focus on Ruth and follow along with canon very loosely as I mould the plans to fit with my personal AU. Hope you enjoy!
> 
> These characters were not created by me, only Ruth.

"But papa!"

Ruth Crawley, youngest of the Crawley girls, was very stubborn and rather naive. Being the youngest had its perks, but being 'babied' by her parents was definitely not a perk.

"I said no Ruth, and that is final" Robert Crawley spoke firmly. Ruth had the bright idea of wanting to go out to a common pub, which appalled her father tremendously.

"I promise I'll be careful" Ruth pleaded, she wouldn't give up so easily. But neither would her father.

"Ruth, I will not keep repeating myself to you" he responded simply. In her own response Ruth scowled, marching out of the library, stumbling over the edge of a rug and almost into her mother on her way out.

"What happened this time?" Cora asked frowning as she stood in the doorway watching their youngest daughter storm out of the room.

"She keeps asking to go 'beyond the grounds' as she put it. This is the third time this week" Robert let out an exasperated sigh. "Perhaps we have been too soft on the girl since I haven't the foggiest where she gets this stubborn streak"

Cora merely smiled slightly. "Have you really no idea?" she teased and Robert merely gave her a look. "She only wants to be able to experience the world Robert. Give her some time, she will come around"

"I hope so, because I can't keep having the same conversation over and over. It's maddening. Especially today"

-◇-

"Dead?"

"Looks like it" a maid whispered to her friend. "I heard neither of them were on the list of survivors"

"I thought the ship was supposed to be unsinkable" her friend sighed and shook her head.

"Ladies" the sound of the housekeeper, Mrs Hughes, snapped the two young women in their discussion. "I believe you are being paid to work, not to stand around and gossip the day away" she spoke firmly and the maids murmured quick apologies before returning to their work.

Mrs Hughes merely sighed, it was bound to be the talk of the house for a while, the heir of Grantham being killed tragically. However that was no excuse for standards to begin slipping.

-◇-

Ruth had found sanctuary in her bedroom that she shared with her elder sisters, though to say she was happy with the arrangement would be a lie. She only really got along with Sybil, especially since they were so close in age, they used to pretend they were twins. Mary could be cruel both as a child and as a young woman to her but it was mainly Edith who always seemed to have it in for Ruth. She never understood why. Sybil was the only thing that united the four young women.

With a huff, Ruth fell onto her bed face first and let out a loud frustrated groan. Very unladylike, Granny wouldn't be amused, but she wasn't amused either by being cooped up in the house constantly. She missed being a child, where she could run free around the house. Of course she would be reprimanded but she would continue regardless. Her favourite place to go would be downstairs, frequently visiting the two heads of staff. Perhaps that's one of the reasons Mary disliked her, because she was also close to Carson the butler.

Though now she was getting older. She wasn't able to explore or go outside to play in the gardens, to see the butterflies, to attempt climbing trees (papa was not pleased though mama couldn't help smirking slightly). As a child she had hoped becoming older would mean she could leave the grounds to explore, but of course that was a fantasy.

She would be turning fifteen this year, and yet she felt she was in limbo. Other girls her age, in her eyes, had the ability to find themselves. To have the chance to have their own endeavors, whereas she felt trapped. At times she wished she were like those other girls, desperately, as she never felt as though she belonged. And this feeling was growing ever more present the older she became.

Her thoughts were interrupted when she heard someone come into the room. She moved her head slightly to see her sister standing there, though not one she would've elected to see at this moment.

"What on earth are you doing laying on your bed like that?" Mary asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Because I'm fed up" Ruth mumbled simply with a small huff. She was just glad it wasn't Edith. "Sorry about your fancy man, though I bet you're more relieved than anything" she teased and Mary scowled.

"Really Ruth, just because you're in a foul mood that doesn't mean you have to put everyone else in a worse one" she looked rather disappointed in her sister and Ruth sat up.

"Yes you're right, sorry" she said sheepishly as she looked down fiddling with her hands. "For being rude and about Patrick" she clarified and Mary merely raised an eyebrow.

"Well as much as I appreciate your concern, I'd rather you be more civilised in the first place" she retorted and Ruth tried not to smirk.

"You're starting to sound more like Granny" she teased, trying to get her sister to at least crack a smile. It didn't work as Mary frowned again.

"I am acting as a lady should. Perhaps you should take some notes" she simply turned and walked out as Ruth rolled her eyes and lay back down on her bed. She didn't know how much longer she could handle living with Mary and Edith, it was maddening. Her 'hot headedness' and 'common mouth', as her Grandmother would say, didn't help either. Of course she would blame mama's american gene's which for some reason would make Cora quite evasive. The subject would be dropped without hesitation.

But it all added up to the feeling of not belonging in her own home, in her own family either. And it drove Ruth mad. She needed space, where no one like Mary could interrupt.

-◇-

  
Whilst on his rounds, Carson couldn't help but notice the tensions in the household. The deaths of James and Patrick Crawley had shaken the family enough, and if that weren't enough he could hear the bickering of the younger ladies of the house from near the door where he stood. Today most definitely hadn't gotten off to a good start. The familiar noise of the frustrated stomps of who could only be the younger daughter were heard coming down the stairs. He glanced over and sure enough Ruth had a look in her eyes that would scare him if it were directed at him. And Carson didn't scare easily.

"Good morning milady" he said clearly in his gruff voice which seemed to snap the girl out of her foul mood as she smiled at the butler.

"Good morning Carson! I hope you're well" she answered politely, "Everyone else is in a rather nasty mood this morning"

"I am as well as can be expected milady" Carson replied with a hint of a smile which faded as he spoke again. "I'm afraid the news received this morning has both shocked and saddened many of us" Ruth gave a small nod and sighed.

"If you don't mind Carson, I'd rather not speak about that" she said plainly, "not that I don't feel sympathy and all that but I don't really want to add that to my basket of woes just yet"

"Is there anything troubling you milady?" Carson asked, frowning now concerned as he noticed her usual cheerful expression was replaced with one of deflation.

"Oh it's nothing important really" she said quickly but it was obvious she was lying as she couldn't look the older man in the eye. "But do you feel that at times, you just don't belong?"

Now that shocked Carson, but he didn't let it show; or at least the girl didn't notice. "I don't suppose I have" he said as he thought carefully on what his words would be.

"Then you're lucky, goodbye Carson" Ruth said rather quickly before rushing off, stumbling on the rug as she left a stunned butler wondering what all that was about.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello readers! Just a quick note apologising for my spelling and grammatical errors in my previous chapter. My spell check broke and I didn't realise until after publishing. Hopefully those have been corrected. Hope you enjoy it! 

Ruth went to the only place she could think of. The only place she could relax. She tried her best to avoid the staff as she rushed downstairs where she could sneak out of the staff entrance. Being outside provided her with a lot of comfort, but she didn't want the staff to know in case anyone asked after her. She wanted to be alone to think. 

But once in the corridor she saw a group of maids heading in her direction. Without thinking she leapt into the first room she could get into, shutting the door behind her and giving Mrs Hughes a fright as she sat unexpectedly at her desk sorting through some of the paperwork.

"Lady Ruth, what brings you here?" She asked as she tried to regain composure. Ruth internally groaned as she foiled her own plans. 

"My apologies Mrs Hughes. I just didn't want to be seen down here" she confessed, "I didn't mean to startle you"

"Oh no it's fine, no harm done" Mrs Hughes assured the younger girl who breathed a sigh of relief. "However may I ask why you would want to be sneaking around downstairs?" Ruth tried looking anywhere but to the woman who had her eyebrow raised in question. "I hope you aren't sneaking out again milady, you know how it worries your parents"

And there it was. She saw right through her plans. Again. 'Then maybe you shouldn't be doing this every other day' she thought as she let out a sigh. 

"I'm sorry but I just can't deal with them anymore Mrs Hughes" she admits looking at her feet to hide tears forming in her eyes. "I just feel so lost" 

"Oh dear don't get yourself all worked up" Mrs Hughes spoke softly immediately going to the girl and placing her hand on her arm. "Come sit down, I'll get you some tea. It'll be just like when you were little" at that Ruth managed to smile remembering how she would come to this room when she would be bullied by her elder sisters, Mrs Hughes always managed to help her to smile, and Carson if he was also in the room at the time. 

"Thank you Mrs Hughes, I would like that very much" she admitted and Mrs Hughes smiled at that also. 

After some tea, cake and time to calm down, Ruth was feeling much more relaxed and herself. She had tried not to burden Mrs Hughes but she was able to work as they spoke. 

"You know, I always did love coming down here" Ruth said with a smile. "I always feel so at ease, more than when I'm upstairs" 

Mrs Hughes couldn't help but smile. "Well I'm glad you feel comfortable milady. You are welcome here just so long as you don't get yourself into trouble" she warned, firm but her voice still gentle. Ruth just smirked.

"Oh come now Mrs Hughes. You know my middle name might as well be trouble" she let out a giggle and Mrs Hughes rolled her eyes playfully, but then she noticed Ruth's smile fall from her face. "I don't think I belong here Mrs Hughes" she whispered, the sentence should've surprised the housekeeper and it did, but not as much as it should've done.

"How could you think such a thing?" she asked, frowning in concern.

"Because I stick out like a sore thumb, because I never fitted in, because I don't belong in this family. And now I know what I'll do" she said firmly. "I'll run away"

"Please tell me I'm hearing you incorrectly" Mrs Hughes spoke as she looked horrified at the thought, which of course she was. There was no point in hiding that fact.

"But why should I stay? I just feel in the way of things" Ruth argued as she gently twirled the teacup in her hands, swirling the remaining drops of leftover tea I'm the bottom.

"Because you have a family who love you dearly, who would be heartbroken if you were to leave this way" Mrs Hughes tried her best to reason with Ruth. "I'm begging you not to do this milady, if not for them then for yourself. Because I know you'll live to regret leaving this way" 

Ruth looked tearfully to Mrs Hughes, the sight broke her heart. She beckoned her to come closer and Ruth rushed over and hugged her tightly, sobbing into her shoulder. "It'll be alright milady, you'll see" she whispered trying to help rid the poor girl of these feelings. It reminded her of when Lady Ruth was much younger but still having trouble adjusting to the world she was growing up in.

-◇-

1903

Mrs Hughes had not long sat in her sitting room to complete some paperwork when there was a knock on the door. It was very slight and she barely heard it which piqued her curiosity.

"Come in" she called looking to the door where a little girl peaked inside, her blue eyes filled with tears which immediately concerned the housekeeper. "Oh Lady Ruth, whatever is the matter?" She asked standing up and the girl first looked fearful before she cautiously walked into the room closing the door behind her. 

"Th-They were mean t-o me, Mary and Edith" she stammered sniffling. Now it shocked Mrs Hughes that the girl would come to her office, the young girls seemed intimidated by her though she never meant to come across that way. Carson was more friendly with the children of course. "And I c-couldn't find Mr Carson" Ruth continued and that's when it made more sense to her. 

"Well you can stay here for a while if you wish, I could fetch some milk and biscuits if it would help" she offered and Ruth managed a small smile which the housekeeper returned. 

"May I have some shortbread cookies please Mrs Hughes? Those are my favourites" the five year old asked to which Mrs Hughes nodded. 

"Of course, those are my favourites too" she confessed and the girl smiled a little, climbing into the spare chair and sitting there as Mrs Hughes went quickly to fetch some milk and shortbread, much to the shock of Mrs Patmore who would have asked if she knew it wouldn't become another argument between the strong willed women. 

And as quick as she was there, the housekeeper left with the items on a tray and returned to where Lady Ruth was looking around the sitting room with curiosity, 

"Your room isn't as scary as Mary says it is" Ruth said simply as Mrs Hughes placed the tray on the table. 

"Well I would hope it's not scary at all milady" she said as she sat down opposite the little girl who was still looking around the room. 

"Well you're not as scary as Mary says either Mrs Hughes" Ruth continued and smiled shyly to which Mrs Hughes couldn't help but smile back. 

"I'm glad you think so." she said as the girl nibbled on her cookie and smiled sweetly. "And what about me would you say is scary?" She asked curiously

"Well you wear dark colours and always look so serious. And sometimes people hear you telling off the maids" she said simply to which Mrs Hughes raised her eyebrow but couldn't really argue with the child's logic. 

"I see, well I hope I'm not too frightening for a brave girl like you milady" she said, hoping she wasn't actually frightening the poor girl. Ruth grinned at her and shook her head. 

"No, I don't think so." She spoke assuredly, "I mean would a scary person get you biscuits and milk when you're sad? I don't think so" she said simply and Mrs Hughes couldn't help but chuckle a little.

"Well I believe that's some fine reasoning" she said smiling to Ruth who grinned back brightly and quite proudly that she was brave enough to enter the lair of Mrs Hughes. "Now why don't you tell me what got you in such a state and maybe I can help?" 

That would be the first of many visits Ruth would make to Mrs Hughes' sitting room. She grew to love spending time with the housekeeper just as much as Carson, who promised her he wouldn't get jealous. In fact he liked seeing Mrs Hughes interacting with Ruth, it reminded him of when he had first met her before she became 'Mrs Hughes' and was Elsie the head housemaid, before she had all the responsibilities and stress of running the household with him. 

-◇-

Back in the present

Ruth stayed cuddled up to Mrs Hughes for a while until she calmed down enough to at least stop crying. Still sniffling, she sat up straight and wiped her eyes with a handkerchief Mrs Hughes offered to her.

"Thank you" she whispered, her voice soft but shaky from her crying spell. 

"Oh my dear you don't have to thank me" Mrs Hughes assured her giving a small comforting smile as she stroked her arm. "I just want you to be happy here with your family" 

"I do too, but it's just so difficult." Ruth whispered, shaking her head and looking down at the handkerchief in her hand, running her thumbs along the embroidered edge.

"I know it's hard, but I'm sure that you can." Ruth smiled to the older woman, thankful to have someone on her side. 

-◇-

"We need to tell her at some point Cora" 

"Robert please, I don't want to discuss this now" Cora said quietly, cautious that someone might overhear the conversation. 

"And when will we discuss it? Tomorrow? In a month? When she's an adult with her own family?" her husband tried to reason. "Can't you see the longer we keep this a secret the worse it will be for her when she finds out the truth"

"But what if she hates us?" Now Robert went silent. He hadn't thought of that. He tried to shake such thoughts from his mind as he held Cora's hands in his. 

"She needs to be told the truth. They all do" he said firmly but also in a gentle way, getting heated wouldn't solve this predicament. "Before she or somebody else finds out for themselves and it's too late"

Cora sighed but nodded, she knew Robert was right in what he said. Only a handful of people knew about Ruth's situation and she deserved to know for herself. 

"Alright, but not tonight. Let her have one more night of ignorance before we tell the girls" Robert nodded to his wife, wrapping an arm around her and kissing her head. This wasn't going to be easy.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading this story. I have big plans, hopefully I can pull them off.

As Edith walked through the halls to find her mother she couldn't help overhearing a certain conversation happening in the sitting room. One concerning her dear sister Ruth. She let out a small gasp as she heard a sentence that had the ability to change everyone's lives, and probably not for the better.

As much as she disliked her sister, she knew that they all needed to hear the truth. And by the sounds of it. Their parents wouldn't be divulging that information anytime soon. 'I need to tell them' she thought as she quickly made herself scarce.

-◇-

Ruth had stayed with Mrs Hughes for about an hour before the housekeeper was called to sort something out in preparation for dinner that evening. She assured her friend that she would be fine.

"Really Mrs Hughes, I'll be back upstairs. Don't let me get in the way" she said with a warm smile, though it was slightly forced. Mrs Hughes could see this but she really couldn't stay much longer. She gave a small nod and a worried glance before she left Ruth alone in the sitting room.

Sighing, Ruth got to her feet before making her way upstairs. On her way she accidentally bumped into Anna, surprising her into nearly dropping the equipment she was carrying.

"

Lady Ruth, I'm so sorry-"

"No no it's me who should be apologising Anna, I should've been looking where I was going" Ruth said quickly with a sympathetic smile.

"What brings you downstairs this time milady?" Anna asked with a small smile.

"I just thought I would go speak with Mrs Hughes. It's been too long since I've visited last" Ruth responded, choosing not to reveal the whole reason. She liked Anna, but she wouldn't want to vent her problems to her.

"Well I don't think she would hold a grudge against you for that milady" Anna said with her usual friendly smile which always seemed so contagious to Ruth who couldn't help smiling back.

"But she may hold one against you for talking in the doorway to one of the family" both Ruth and Anna jumped and turned to see Miss O'Brien, Cora's lady's maid that always made Ruth very uneasy. The fright resulted in Anna dropping a couple of her things which Ruth quickly picked up.

"Well we won't tell if you won't O'Brien" she said smiling to the woman as she quickly handed the items over to Anna who hurried away. O'Brien merely nodded to the girl before making her way up to her quarters without another word.

Ruth let out a breath she didn't know she had been holding before rushing out of the corridor. Maybe she should've just used the front door in the first place.

-◇-

"So this Matthew is more entitled to our money than me?" Mary asked in utter disbelief.

"

We are trying to find a way around it but it looks that way" Cora responded, also very annoyed by the whole situation.

"But who even is he? Some stranger who happens to be a man and related to us and he gets everything?"

"Well let's hope he is decent since he is also inheriting mama's fortune" Sybil pointed out as Ruth poked her head inside.

"Have I missed anything?" She asked curiously as she looked to the mixture of irritated and upset looks upon the faces of her family.

"Only that some random relative will be inheriting Mary's inheritance" Edith said as Mary scowled.

"I won't stand for this, and I can't believe you're not fighting harder for your own daughter papa" Mary snapped glaring to her father who was looking rather tired of the conversation.

"If there was anything that could be done I would, but there is nothing that can possibly be done" he tried to reason with his eldest.

"Even your mother agrees with us Robert" Cora said frowning, "we are all fighting this battle so why aren't you?"

"Because it's pointless to fight a losing battle. It'll cause more harm than good" he said shaking his head. "I've said this multiple times"

"Well I think it's outrageous and that you are a coward" Mary said simply before standing and leaving the room, Cora let out a sigh and Ruth decided to follow Mary. She rushed after her eldest sister and gently caught her arm.

"Mary, I'm sorry I just wish there was something I could do to help." she offered, "If anyone deserves to inherit it's you" but Mary shook her head.

"You're too young to understand any of this Ruth. Please, I know you're trying to be supportive but you're just a child" she said trying not to snap at her.

"Are you sure there's nothing I can do?" Ruth asked with a frown, genuinely wanting to help.

"No. Not unless you can change the whole system that seems to be pinned against us" Mary said simply before turning and walking away, Ruth letting her go have some time to cool off.

-◇-

In an attempt to calm down from the heated afternoon discussion concerning Matthew, Ruth was trying to improve her embroidery skills. A skill she was very much struggling with. She had been sitting concentrating for so long that she didn't even realise Edith came into the room and sat opposite her until she cleared her throat, making the younger girl jump up in surprise and nearly pierce her finger with a needle.

"Edith!" She hissed scowling at her sister who merely smiled at her.

"Well I was going to ask if you wanted some help since it looks as if you've designed a spider on your cloth" Edith teased and Ruth rolled her eyes

"It's supposed to be a daisy" she muttered through gritted teeth.

"Yes and that's clearly going very well for you isn't it. Now do you want help or not?"

"Why? What do you get out of it?" Ruth asked skeptically

"Oh nothing really, I just want to talk"

"About what exactly?"

"Well I just thought we should talk about how you've been doing these past few days" she spoke in a tone she never used with Ruth, one of care. Ruth narrowed her eyes, she knew Edith was up to something that much was obvious.

"Why does it matter to you what I think and do? It's not like you care"

"Oh but you see I've found some information that might explain why you've felt as though you don't belong here" she said with what looked like concern, Ruth couldn't tell if it was genuine or not but it made her uneasy. She didn't know how to respond to such a statement, she sat there frowning in confusion to her sister as Edith smiled a little.

"Aren't you going to ask what it is I know?"

"I'm not sure I want to know whatever it is you're referring to" Ruth admitted. Whatever it was, it was making Edith act strangely, which in itself unnerved her.

"You know you do Ruth. Why is it you've always felt so isolated, so different" the more Edith prodded the more unsettled she felt. But her curiosity was getting the better of her.

"Alright fine, what is it?" She asked with a sigh, but as Edith opened her mouth the door opened.

"There you are, I've been looking everywhere for you Ruth" Sybil said smiling and beckoning her younger sister over. Ruth, although confused, obliged.

"I need your help with something"

"And that is?" Ruth asked as Sybil led her to the door, much to Edith's annoyance.

"Is it really that important Sybil?" She asked, rather irritated at the interruption. "Because I have important information-"

"That you will use to hurt Ruth. I saw you listening to mama and papa's conversation earlier and whatever it is it's not your place" Sybil said firmly, folding her arms as Ruth was looking between them both unsure of what to do.

"What's going on here?" Mary was now in the doorway, having heard how heated the discussion was getting from down the hallway.

"Sybil is interrupting an important conversation"

"Well Edith is trying to be cruel to Ruth and I refuse to let her"

"I just want to know what is going on." Ruth spoke finally.

"Perhaps you would all like to hear what they were talking about, it may be better that way" Edith offered, Sybil was still hesitant and Mary was more confused than when she entered the room.

"Just come out and say it Edith, surely it's not that big of a deal" Mary said impatiently as Sybil gave her a warning look and Edith merely nodded. Ruth was still standing beside Sybil, the waiting was increasingly testing her patience.

"Well I overheard mama and papa talking earlier today, and he said something very peculiar" Edith began, Mary and Ruth both huffed with impatience, Sybil being the only cautious one of the four sisters.

"Which was?" Ruth asked raising her eyebrow

"That you are not our sister, or indeed a Crawley at all. You are adopted"

"Oh Edith really? This suspense for some cruel joke?" Mary scoffed but Ruth remained silent.

"I'm not joking, you can even go ask them" Edith said, folding her arms.

"Maybe I will" Mary retorted, rolling her eyes as Sybil placed a hand on Ruth's arm as the new information sank in.

"Why would I even make a joke like that? I'm not a child and I gain nothing from lying about the fact Ruth is adopted" Edith argued

"Well nobody knows how your twisted mind works"

"Please don't argue," Ruth interrupted, the girls went silent. "There is only one way to see if Edith is lying. We need to hear it for ourselves"

"Ruth this is a bad idea" Sybil warned

"How? How is it a bad idea to know about my family, my life? Sybil I need to know for myself" she said sharply, not meaning to snap at her sister but this had struck a raw nerve. Without waiting for a response she rushed out of the room, Sybil rushing after her as Mary glared at Edith.

"You are evil" she hissed before following her two sisters in pursuit of their parents. Edith thought for a moment, but stood up to follow them also. After all, she was the one to tell them the secret.

-◇-

"Is it true?!" Ruth's voice boomed across the room before she even entered it fully, her parents both turning in shock at the outburst. She stood there, slightly red in the face and hands clenched into fists.

"I'm sorry?" Cora asked, completely taken aback by her tone. Robert looked ready to scold her until she spoke again.

"Am I adopted?!" She demanded. Her parents didn't have to say a word, their silent expressions as they glanced to one another said enough.

"We were going to tell you darling" Cora began to explain but Ruth shook her head.

"You were going to? When? Why would you keep something like this from me?!"

"Ruth please, let's not fight about this." Robert said firmly but also gently. Ruth's elevated voice was attracting the attention of the staff.

"I'm sorry but I think Ruth has a right to be upset" Mary said simply with a frown. "In fact we all do because you've lied to all of us. But especially Ruth"

"We just didn't want you to think you weren't a part of the family just because of your background" Robert tried to reason with his daughters

"But I'm not a part of this family am I?!" Ruth shouted before storming out of the room, tears in her eyes. Nobody moved except Sybil who rushed to her sister's side as she reached their room. Not knowing what to say, she pulled Ruth into a tight hug where her sister cried into her shoulder. Everything she had known, everyone she loved. I wasn't the life she had wanted, but now she felt as though it was never hers to begin with.

Meanwhile downstairs the four Crawleys were still silent. That was until Robert broke the silence.

"How did you find out?" He asked quietly.

"Edith told us." Mary said simply, still scowling before she too walked out. Cora felt a mixture of anger at Edith's actions and despair for Ruth. Blood or not, she was her little girl.

"Edith, is this true?" Robert asked shocked but clearly also angered as Edith looked away.

"How was I to know it would affect her like that. And someone had to tell her, and it certainly wasn't going to be you" she said rather bitterly.

"That still doesn't give you the right to do so," Cora said quietly but harshly. "And I am very hurt and disappointed that you went behind our backs just to hurt your sister"

"But like she said mama, she's not our sister"

"Now that's enough. She is your sister, family is more than the blood in your veins." Robert spoke firmly and without room for argument. "You have caused a lot of damage by your recklessness. I hope you realise the seriousness of what you have done."

"Oh yes. Loud and clear. Yet you're the ones who lied to all of us" Edith snapped before also storming out of the room leaving Cora and Robert alone, where finally Cora allowed tears to flow as she thought of the hurt expression on Ruth's face, the sadness in her eyes. It broke her heart to see her like that.

"

It'll be alright Cora. It will take time to heal but we will all pull through" Robert whispered to his wife, holding her hand in his own and using his free one to wipe away the tears on her cheek. And everyone prayed that would be the case.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if this seems a little rushed. I forgot to include Edith eavesdropping in the last chapter and things have been pretty hectic in life.I've rewrote this chapter about four times and this is the happiest I've been with it so far. Hopefully I'll do better with the next one.
> 
> Future Panana: Also this story is available on Wattpad and Fanfic.net under the same name and my username is the same also!
> 
> It is also why these three chapters were all uploaded within a day. Becayse they were already published on my other accounts. Oops!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I'm sorry this has taken so long to write, writer's block has kept this chapter half finished for so long now.
> 
> I think now is a good time to mention that this will not be strictly following canon since there's a whole new character inserting herself in there. The main points will still stand of course!

Ruth was beyond tense after her parents' confession, so much so that dinner was the last thing on her mind. And yet there she was, sat at the table with her sisters, parents and grandmother. Everyone was silent for a while. 

"So what have I missed?" Granny's voice startled the family who were all acting rather awkward around one another. 

"What do you mean mama?" Robert asked, clearing his voice a little with a slight cough, trying to pierce the awkward tensions at the table. 

"Well clearly something has happened or am I bad company?" She asked rhetorically, raising her eyebrow to her son. "Honestly I've had better conversations with the wall"

"No it's not you mama, really there just isn't anything to talk about" he said simply, avoiding her gaze. 

"Nothing to talk about? Really?" Mary spoke sharply which shocked the table. "You can't just confess to something that alters our whole perspective and say it's nothing"

"Perspective of what? Honestly will you stop speaking in riddles and tell me what on earth is going on" Violet demanded and Cora let out a sigh. 

"Oh Ruth is adopted, didnt you know?" Edith asked, voice dripping with sarcasm as Ruth's hands gripped the cutlery in her hands with such force her knuckles turned white. 

"You don't mean to say you finally told her?"

"Wait, you knew?" Sybil asked, rather taken aback. "And you said nothing?"

"My dear, it was not my place to say anything" Violet spoke as if it were rather trivial to her. Ruth chose to remain silent but glared at her plate with such force it would have erupted in flames if it were possible.

"Speaking of that fact, are you curious as to who your parents are?" Mary asked, trying to diffuse some tension whilst looking at Ruth. 

"What difference does it make?" Ruth said quietly and visibly agitated. "They gave me up, I want nothing to do with them"

"Why not? Surely you don't think they gave you up due to a lack of love or care?" Mary questioned rather concerned for her younger sister. 

"Well why else would they have?" Edith asked. "If she were wanted they would have kept her" the statement rang in Ruth's head, she didn't even hear her parents scold Edith for saying such a cruel thing. 

"You don't know how desperate people can become in certain situations. Giving Ruth away might've been the only choice" Sybil urged trying to provide what little comfort she could after Edith's words.

"Please can we stop talking about this?" Ruth asked quietly, but the request seemed to fall on deaf ears. 

"But do you want to find them? If you do I'm sure we can help" Mary offered but Ruth shook her head. 

"Maybe you'll finally find some sense of belonging" Edith spoke but knowing Ruth would know the true intentions behind her words. That Ruth didn't belong there.

"She *belongs* here with her family" Violet spoke firmly. "Now enough of this, the topic is clearly a very fresh wound. We shouldn't keep poking at it"

"Actually" Ruth got to her feet. "I'd like to be excused. I've rather lost my appetite." Before getting a response she rushed off leaving the family silent once more. Edith managed to hide the roll of her eyes but her two sisters glared at her, annoyed at the hurt she had caused so unnecessarily. 

"So, what of this Matthew?" Violet asked to change the subject, erupting groans from the table. 

-◇-

Thomas was very shocked to hear what he did at dinner, as were the rest of the staff who were serving that evening. When he went downstairs for the next course all the staff were speaking in hushed tones of what occurred upstairs. 

"Adopted? Are you sure?" 

"That's what they all said" William whispered to Daisy who was rather shocked. 

"So she's not a Crawley, I bet she is as common as we are" Thomas spoke, interrupting the conversation.

"But we still serve her as if she is one of the family. Well because she is" William pointed out as Daisy frowned. 

"I don't know, this whole thing just doesn't sit right. I think it's cruel that they kept it a secret for so long" she admitted actually feeling a bit sorry for the girl upstairs. 

"Daisy! You're here to work not to gossip!" Mrs Patmore called. Daisy rushed back to work at once as William gave Thomas a disapproving look. Thomas merely raised his eyebrow, a smug expression on his face as he left. 

-◇-

Ruth was in her room looking out of the window. It was getting darker now, there was still some chill in the spring air from the winter months but it was quickly fading as summertime approached.

The conversation that afternoon concerning her lineage had shocked her greatly. She was always told she looked like her parents as she greatly resembled her mother, as did Mary and Sybil, but clearly that wasn't due to genetics. Nothing could've prepared her for the news, and what stung the most was that it was Edith of all people who had told her the truth. 

She let out a sigh and let herself fall backwards onto her bed. Maybe Edith was right about another thing too, that she should find somewhere she actually belonged. Yes, a break from everyone would do her good. She wouldn't need to deal with Edith's attitude, Mary's constant questions, Sybil and everyone else pitying her for the news. Not to mention they could focus on this business with this Matthew a bit better without her being around to spoil things. Perhaps it really was better if she weren't here at Downton.

-◇-

"You really shouldn't have spoken of such sensitive matters in front of the staff," Violet lectured quietly. "Now you can be certain that there will be gossip downstairs"

"Mama really. This isn't the time for ridicule" Robert said with a deep frown. The dinner hadn't really improved after Ruth had stormed out, it had left a sour taste and tense atmosphere. 

Edith was sat by the fire beside Cora, who had been abnormally quiet. 

"On the contrary, I believe one should comment when necessary. And Edith's behaviour was very unbecoming" Violet said sharply in a tone that made Robert feel as though he were the one in trouble. "Of course, you should have told the truth from the beginning. I always said it would come back to bite you"

"You think we don't realise that already?" Cora spoke quietly but the room was silent as she did so. 

"Well if you didnt realise it by now then that would be an issue of itself" Violet raised her eyebrow but Cora didn't dare look in her direction. She was feeling bad enough about the whole situation without this commentary. "Now, I must insist we deal with Mary's dilemma. Because as it stands, it's the easier of the two to resolve"

"Oh how I wish that were true" Robert whispered with a deep sigh. 

-◇-

"First the titanic and now this? I can hardly believe it" Mrs Hughes whispered in disbelief. It was normal for her to speak with Mr Carson in her sitting room in the evenings, there or his pantry of course. But this was earlier than usual. 

"I know, it's just one blow after another." he said with a deep sigh. "I just keep seeing that look she had, it was very upsetting to say the least." Mrs Hughes bit her lip as she glanced down to the ledger she had been working on before his arrival. 

"You can't exactly blame her for reacting like that. But I do worry about the girl Mr Carson." She paused as a thought passed through her mind. "Surely you don't think she will do something foolish in retaliation do you?" They had both seen the four girls grow up and from what they knew of their personalities; and they were more knowledgeable than most, Ruth had the tendency to act out. Carson frowned as he realised this, he hadn't thought of what she may do afterwards. 

"We can only hope she sees sense. That she is a Crawley and here is her home" he said with a small nod to which Mrs Hughes also responds with a nod and a small sigh. 

"Come on, let's go have something to eat" she said with a small smile as she stood up. Surely the servants' dinner would be ready by now. 

-◇-

Sybil was the first to return to the bedroom, after Ruth of course. She scanned the room and frowned when she noticed it was empty. Ruth was gone. 

-◇-

It was outside, under an old oak tree in the darkness of night that Ruth sought solitude. She had always loved being outside, but here she always found it more comforting. With a stunning view of the grounds and of the Abbey all lit up in the night, it truly was a magical place. 

She lay on the grass as she tried to see what stars she could see tonight. She didn't know much about the official constellations but that never stopped her from making her own up. But tonight the beautiful lights were hidden behind a layer of thick cloud. The moon was barely visible, a subtle glow behind some more clouds. Ruth didn't even realise that from these clouds, rain began to fall. This rain mixing with her tears shed after thinking more about the evening and the repercussions of this news. 

But then the skies fully opened up, suddenly she was being drenched by the downpour. Oh the joys of the English weather. She really couldn't catch a break today. 

She rushed back towards the house, shivering as the cold water soaked through the fabric of her dress, mud coating the hemline and her shoes but she couldn't really care how she looked, only that she was now freezing. 

When she finally arrived back, she realised just how long she had been outside for. All the lights were off, the front door she assumed to be locked. But she wouldn't be entering through the front door, not in her state at least. Which left her with an alternative, the servants entrance. How she got out in the first place. She quietly opened the door and slipped inside unnoticed without much effort. But the real challenge was to get upstairs unnoticed.

Undoing her shoes, she held them in her hand, with the other she held her skirts so she wouldn't create a trail of mud. Water was still dribbling down her back from her soaked hair, dripping onto the stone floor, but that couldn't be helped. At least she would be quieter on her mission to her room.

She was almost at the bottom of the stairs when she heard footsteps. She internally groaned as Daisy came downstairs.

"M'lady" she exclaimed with eyes slightly wide in shock at the state Ruth was in, soaking, covered with mud and eyes slightly reddened. 

"I'd appreciate it if you said nothing about this. Please. I just want to go to bed" Ruth said quietly so as not to draw attention to herself. But it was hard not to when she looked as if she had been swimming fully clothed. 

"Oh I won't, I promise" Daisy assured her with a nod. "Should I get you something like a towel or some hot chocolate?" She offered knowing the girl had already had a tough day. And she didn't really expect her to agree to it. She had only come downstairs because she thought she had forgotten something in the servants hall.

"Hot chocolate? That sounds marvellous" Ruth admitted with a sheepish smile which Daisy returned. 

-◇-

"Thank you" Ruth said softly as Daisy handed her the hot beverage, a towel around her shoulders. It was slightly awkward between the two at first, but the tension melted rather quickly for Ruth when she sipped the sweet liquid. 

"Is there anything else I can do for you m'lady?" The maid asked. 

"Maybe you could also have a cup, keep me company?" Ruth suggested rather timidly. Daisy was quite taken aback by the suggestion of course. "I promise you won't get into trouble. You can blame the whole thing on me" 

"Are you sure?"

"Positive. In fact I insist you join me with your own cup" Ruth gave a warm smile. Daisy remained reluctant but poured herself some hot chocolate also. 

"So, why were you outside so late?" She asked and Ruth let out a sigh. 

"I assume you've heard about what happened at dinner"

"Well.. yeah I did." Daisy admitted, finding no reason to not be honest. 

"Yes, well I just went out for some air. To think a little" Ruth confessed pressing her lips together. "Then the rain started and I ran into you"

"Yeah sorry about that m'lady" she gave a small smile but Ruth shook her head. 

"No I'm glad I did. Especially since you make a great hot chocolate" The girls let out a small giggle and conversed further, soon both cups were empty. But the pair jumped when they heard a door open. 

"Daisy? What are you doing up so late?" Mr Carson's voice was heard before they really registered his presence. Daisy immediately jumped to her feet, struggling to find a suitable response. Especially with the stern look he gave her once seeing who she was in company with. "Lady Ruth? What brings you down here at such an hour?"

"Sorry Carson, Daisy has been helping me. I got caught in the rain on a walk" Ruth explained, also getting to her feet. The man nodded slightly as Mrs Hughes poked her head out from her sitting room. 

"Well I think you should be off to bed now Daisy" the older woman spoke with a slight raised eyebrow. The girl didn't waste any time as she made her way to the stairs, bidding everyone a goodnight. 

"Thank you again Daisy" Ruth called after her, Daisy responded with a small grin before continuing to climb the stairs. 

"We should probably follow suit my lady" 

"Of course, you're right Carson" Ruth gave a nod and smile. "Goodnight to you both" 

"Goodnight my lady"

"Sleep well"

It was only when Ruth had left their presence that the pair gave a worrying glance between the door and one another. Both concerned of what will become of the youngest Crawley daughter now the secret was out. 

-◇-

Ruth quietly slipped into her bedroom, sorting herself out quietly and sliding into bed. 

"Where were you this time?" Sybil's voice was merely a whimper but enough to make Ruth nearly jump out of her skin. 

"The same place" Ruth mumbled. "Did anyone ask after me?"

"No. I covered for you. Again" Sybil rolled her eyes a little but then her look softened. "You had me worried."

"Worried? Why?"

"Because I didn't know whether you'd be coming back this time. In case you ran away" Then it was Ruth's turn to soften as she walked over to her sister. The pair wrapping the other in a tight but caring hug. "Promise me you wont" it was barely audible but Ruth heard it clearly. 

"I won't run away" she said firmly, pausing for a moment to collect her thoughts. "But I think I should talk to mama and papa about me staying somewhere else for a while. Maybe aunt Rosamund's"

"Well whatever it is. I don't care as long as you come back" Sybil declared with a smile. "Sisters stick together right?"

Ruth grinned in response and nodded. "Yeah, you're stuck with me for now" However, in her mind she couldn't help but doubt that statement just a little bit. But she would try, for Sybil's sake more than anyone else's.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Terribly sorry if this chapter isn't so good. I've been tweaking it so much but I still can't get it right. Hopefully it'll improve soon. Thank you for being so patient :)


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